“Minsan, may mga gabing sana’y wala ng umaga”

This is somewhat a book reaction of Bata, Bata… Pa’no ka Ginawa? Pero let me post this in Tagalog, pasensya na. Wala ako sa mood mag ingles para sa kabuuan ng post na ito.

Sa wakas ay natapos ko na ang libro. Ang susunod sa listahan ay ‘GAPÔ at Desaparesidos. At katulad ng naunang libro na nabasa ko ay masasabi kong tungkol ito sa isang makabagong babae: isang kaibigan, makabayan, at isang ina na si Lea Bustamante.

Sa totoo lang, napapakunot ako sa iilang eksena ng libro na ito. Hindi kasi ako sanay na makatuklas ng gano’ng klaseng babae. Hindi naman sa puros negatibo, pero may kaunti akong hindi nagustuhan sa karakter ni Lea. Isa pa, masyado lang akong konserbatibo siguro.

Yep, naiintindihan ko na tao pa rin ang tao kahit kasal na siya, may karelasyon na, o committed na sa isang tungkulin. Hindi mo naman kasi matuturuan ang puso… Malaya kang mahalin kung sino ang gustong mong mahalin, at gawin ang mga bagay na gusto mong gawin, lalo na kung makakapag-unlad ito ng iyong sarili. Pero, may mga parteng hindi ako sumang-ayon, at nagpaduda pa sa akin lalo sa ibig sabihin ng “pagmamahal.” Oo, inaamin kong doon napokus ang aking atensyon sa buong pagbabasa. Alam kong may mas malalim pang ibig sabihin ang libro, tulad na lang ng pagtuklas sa sarili, pagsunod sa nais gawin, at syempre, pakikiaglaban sa politikal na aspeto ng buhay. Pero dito, sa pag-ibig o pagmamahal… sa paksang lahat ay makaka-relate, mas napokus ang atensyon ko.

Posible nga kayang magmahal ng dalawang tao, o higit pa? Pero kung mahal mo siya, at mahal mo rin ang isa… sino ang mas mahal mo sa dalawa? Bakit, at paano nagkaiba ang pagmamahal na iyon sa isa’t-isa, at sa iba? Totoong tanong iyon dahil hindi ko pa nararanasan. Isa ring mahirap sagutin, o kung masagot man ay mahihirapan pa rin akong intindihin.

Siguro, ang isa sa mga nagustuhan ko sa kwento ay ang karakter na ni Lea na kung ano desisyon niya ay paninindigan niya iyon. Naramdaman ko rin siya sa ilang katangian na nakikita ko rin sa aking mga kaibigan at maging sa aking ina. Si Lea, sa kabila ng magiging matatag ay mahina rin. Lalo na sa kaniyang nararamdamang lungkot at pag-iisa. Oo, may mga anak siya, pero naramdamang kong she’s still longing for something real. Something deeper. Hindi lang basta connection sa isang tao, hindi lang sparks. Sino ba namang hindi naglo-long sa gano’n ‘di ba? At kapag naramdaman mo ‘yon, mapapasabi ka na lang ng… “Minsan, may mga gabing sana’y wala nang umaga.” gaya ng title ng post na ito. Malaking tama sa akin ng parte na ito sa libro at naramdaman ko kung gaano kalungkot si Lea:

“Mahal kita pero mamaya’y wala ka na’t malulungkot ako. Hahanap-hanapin kita, iiyak ako, magdurusa ako… pero kasama ‘yon sa mga katotohanang kailangang yakapin ko. Doon ka, dito ako… kanya ka, wala ako. Pag itinanong niya ‘ko sayo, sabihin mo: magkaibigan na lang tayo.”

Malungkot hindi ba? Maligaya ka, pero hindi magtatagal ang kaligayahan na iyon. Malungkot ka, at babaunin mo ‘yon habang wala ang kaligayahan sa’yo. Madalas ay mas matagal ang kalungkutang mararamdaman mo, dahil matagal dumating ang ligaya, subalit mabilis mawala.

Naramdaman ko rin si Ojie. Gaya ko rin siyang lumaking hindi kapiling ang tunay na ama. Naramdaman ko kung gaano kahirap kapag tinatanong kang “Nasa’n ang tatay mo?”, pero mas maswerte lang ako’t mahal din ako ng tinuring kong ama na tiyuhin ko, asawa ng tiyahin ko’t kapatid ni Mama, dahil sa kanila ako lumaki. Heh. Share lang.

Ang libro perpekto para sa mga single mom, gaya ni Lea. Sa mga ina na mag-isang bumubuhay sa kanilang mga anak, na ayaw lang makulong bilang isang ina.

At para sa pagtatapos ng post na ito, narito ang dalawa sa mga linyang halos bumuod sa libro:

Bata-bata… pa’no ka ginawa? Dahil may dalawang tao riyan na naghandog ng sarili nila sa isa’t-isa, dalawang tao na nag-akalang magkabuhol na ang buhay nila. At kahit nang matuklasan nila na mabubuhay rin pala sila nang wala ang isa, wala nang magagawa… ang bata ay eto na.

Bata, bata… pa’no ka ginawa? Hindi bigla kundi unti-unti, tulad sa lahat ng normal na proseso ng paglaki. Unti-unti’y nakikita mong may iba’t-ibang mukha ang mga tao, isa-isang natutunugan mo ang iba’t-ibang kahulugan ng mga ingay at tinig. Sa paglaki, napapansin mong may mga tanong na mahirap sagutin, at may mga utos na mahirap sundin. Higit sa lahat, natutuklasan mo na habang naririnig mo ang mga sagot, lalong dumarami ang naiisip mong mga tanong….

Book Review: Dekada ’70 by Lualhati Bautista

My mind is fighting over what language I should use as I write this book review of Ms. Lualhati Bautista. But because, I started this post in English, I guess I have to be responsible in finishing this in English. Just correct my grammar if I’m wrong, that would be much appreciated. Hehe.

First thing’s first, I would just like to say some introduction about the book:
Dekada ’70 was set during Marcos’ Regime, and it was one of the political novel that depicts strong point of view about the Martial Law. This book made me appreciate the life more — this current life and state that we’re in, much to say. We’re still lucky to not experience suppression like before. We can consider ourselves more free though we’re not completely, compared to the past. Poverty is still rapidly increasing, and more people are still dying. However, we must be (somehow) thankful that we can now get to voice out our opinions anytime, anywhere.

Though aside from that, the book is also a feminist. Well, feminism dominates the political point of this book. It tackles and narrate how women struggled to live as a woman (not just a wife) before, esp. during the time when women being equal to men was still a concept. The book, indeed, is such a powerful tool and an eye-opener to all the women, especially housewives — mothers, to know their rights and discover their own capabilities as a woman.

Anyway, just to share you something, I got the book together with her other books in Manila International Book Fair this year and they were all signed by Ms. Lualhati herself!!! My heart was so happy even though I got broke after he he.

Getting to the post, I guess I have to start the book review.

Setting
I am not familiar to the time that this book was written. I didn’t personally experience Martial Law, but I know some stories from the books and stories of the people from that time. I could say that Ms. Lualhati is such a nice story teller because she made me feel, and made me experience the struggles of the people in that time just by reading the book. From the moment you read the first ten chapters, you will be automatically be dragged to the past.

Characters
There are more than just one character in this story. It was not just about Amanda, the mother of five boys (Julian Jr “Jules”, Isagani, Eman, Jason and Bingo). It was about Filipino families who lived in the most horrifying times of their lives.

My favorite is Jules, the eldest son of Amanda and Julian Bartolome. He reminded me of my eldest brother, for the reason that they were the same. keyword: were. It was long, long ago so I think it’s now safe to share about it. My brother is already living a life far from Jules now, anyway. But I salute him for choosing to stand and make a move for the sake of the Filipino people.

I also like Em. Ah well, he is the most ideal character for me. I want to become like him. Because he chose to fight in a way that is less harmful than what his brother did. I can say that they are the same, but still different. He is also the calmest character in the book. From the time he entered college and pursue the thing he love, despite of his father’s opposition to him becoming a writer, he just stay calmed and pursued the course. And also the part when… he told his father what happened to Jason. It was a heartbreaking scene for me. If I were him, I’m probably running home already crying, making everyone panic.

The characters, despite of being written by just one person, made their own characteristics and personality in the book. For example, the five Bartolome brothers, they are children of Amanda and Julian, but that’s the only thing they share in common. They are all different, because they have their own lives, and choices. They create their own path in life.

Favorite quote
“Hindi iisang paraan lang nakikitungo ang tao sa kapwa niya, dahil siguro iba-iba ang pangangailangan natin sa iba’t-ibang tao, iba-iba ang inaasahan niya sa iba’t-ibang tao, tulad din ng iba-iba ang inaasahan ng iba’t-ibang tao sa kanya.”
(The reason why people don’t treat other people in only one way, because maybe we have various necessities from different people, we have various expectations from different people, just like different people expect various things from us.)

I may have to disagree to this just a little, because if you’re going to absorb the quote and it will made you say “yeah, it’s right”, then that will count you as an opportunist. But well, this is the cruel truth that is happening now in the society. Again, correct me, if I’m wrong.

Reaction
Well, didn’t I just write my reaction in the first part of this post? Hahaha. Uhm. I have nothing left to put in this part aside from I loved the book. It knows how to hit me in the soft spot and also make me question the truth written in the book. I suggest you should read this too if you haven’t. It is such a great story written by a legend.

I am currently reading “Bata, Bata… Paano ka Ginawa?” and I can say that it’s also a feminist book, so yeah. I’ll also try to come up with a book review after I read that. For now, I will end this post.

Ciao.

Book Review: Fathomless by Jackson Pearce

“Celia Reynolds is the youngest in a set of triplets and the one with the least valuable power. Anne can see the future, and Jane can see the present, but all Celia can see is the past. And the past seems so insignificant — until Celia meets Lo. Lo doesn’t know who she is. Or who she was. Once a human, she is now almost entirely a creature of the sea — a nymph, an ocean girl, a mermaid — all terms too pretty for the soulless monster she knows she’s becoming. Lo clings to shreds of her former self, fighting to remember her past, even as she”s tempted to embrace her dark immortality. When a handsome boy named Jude falls off a pier and into the ocean, Celia and Lo work together to rescue him from the waves. The two form a friendship, but soon they find themselves competing for Jude”s affection. Lo wants more than that, though. According to the ocean girls, there”s only one way for Lo to earn back her humanity. She must persuade a mortal to love her … and steal his soul.”

Okay, so this is a book review. So let’s start. (I really want the book!! ><)

Names and Personalities/Attitudes: The names, the names of the “ocean girls” were actually cool. I really love Key’s(Julia’s) name and of course Lo/Nadia. The triplets names (Anne, Jane, Celia) were kinda common but their personalities, when you read the book are perfect to them. But I don’t understand myself why I keep seeing Saoirse Ronan in my head while reading Celia’s POV. haha! Is it because they’re blonde? Eeh…

Settings: Since I love to be at the shore… always, I kinda envy Celia and Nadia/Lo because they can go there whenever they want. The settings, near the ocean, by the pier, near the church, it’s perfect.

Plot: The story’s about mermaids, or so I thought, well, at least they have lovely voice and cool skin color! lol and how did they became like that, and why did they forget the past, and what will they become in future. I also love the fact that the two protagonist in the story, Nadia/Lo and Celia, a girl who can’t remember her past and a girl who can read memories, have met! How cool.

Lessons: Too many to mention! *u*

Reaction: It’s a good book~ I started reading it last night and I can’t help not to finish it. I spent my whole day, though I should be doing much more important things than reading, but I just can’t let go of my cellphone (cause I dl it thru ebook, but promise to buy the book when I have money!!!). I recommend this book! Especially if you love fantasy and the ocean! :)

P.S. Sorry for not posting here much, Worpy! I’ve been busy these past few days. But don’t worry, I’ll update you with my drawings, later!

P.P.S. I’ll start to idolize Jackson Pearce. Will read some of his books, now!!