Burr Espresso (for my blurry mind lol)

Hola pips! I rarely post something on a weekday, but this post was meant to post last Sunday, but because I wasn’t feeling well during that time, I am here to blog about the newly opened café shop in Angono!

Actually, I was supposed to meet a friend that day, but it got cancelled with the same reason why I am writing about this now. She was the one who didn’t feel well, btw. lol. Hihi. And so, I asked my niece if she could accompany me somewhere because I really want to go outside the house, and we ended up going to Burr Espresso, just in front of Angono Medical Hospital.

Good thing that the café is still open. And oh, I think they’re operating for the whole day. I saw the store still lit last Friday at 3am when we attended the Ginuman2018, so I guess the shop is open 24hrs. Well, this is just a guess. lol.

You will be greeted by someone upon entering. He’s also the one who opened the door for us, and I find it very polite. There is also a bench on the left side of the door, and a santa claus with gifts! Aaahh, Christmas is here.

The place is not that big, aaaaand I didn’t also take a pic of the other corners because there were many people that night. I am shy. Hihi. But the interior is cool. You can find different kind of tables here, high, and low, small and big.

Just like other cafés, you will order at he counter and pay before they serve you your food. I must say, the price of some menus are higher than the regular prices you can avail in local cafés, but I think it is also worth a penny. We only ordered two frappes (Choco Java, and Salted Caramel), a slice of choco mousse cake, a chocolate waffle (that I really liked!!!), and the Tuna-Pesto pasta (that I think my mother can cook, even more delicious hihi). 😅

They also have rice meals if you’re wondering. Most of the menu starts at 120php and above. :)

I didn’t notice if there was music in the café, the people were so noisy looool. Anyway, I will surely go back and try the other sweets!!! I liked their waffle much and I think the other cakes taste good too!

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“Minsan, may mga gabing sana’y wala ng umaga”

This is somewhat a book reaction of Bata, Bata… Pa’no ka Ginawa? Pero let me post this in Tagalog, pasensya na. Wala ako sa mood mag ingles para sa kabuuan ng post na ito.

Sa wakas ay natapos ko na ang libro. Ang susunod sa listahan ay ‘GAPÔ at Desaparesidos. At katulad ng naunang libro na nabasa ko ay masasabi kong tungkol ito sa isang makabagong babae: isang kaibigan, makabayan, at isang ina na si Lea Bustamante.

Sa totoo lang, napapakunot ako sa iilang eksena ng libro na ito. Hindi kasi ako sanay na makatuklas ng gano’ng klaseng babae. Hindi naman sa puros negatibo, pero may kaunti akong hindi nagustuhan sa karakter ni Lea. Isa pa, masyado lang akong konserbatibo siguro.

Yep, naiintindihan ko na tao pa rin ang tao kahit kasal na siya, may karelasyon na, o committed na sa isang tungkulin. Hindi mo naman kasi matuturuan ang puso… Malaya kang mahalin kung sino ang gustong mong mahalin, at gawin ang mga bagay na gusto mong gawin, lalo na kung makakapag-unlad ito ng iyong sarili. Pero, may mga parteng hindi ako sumang-ayon, at nagpaduda pa sa akin lalo sa ibig sabihin ng “pagmamahal.” Oo, inaamin kong doon napokus ang aking atensyon sa buong pagbabasa. Alam kong may mas malalim pang ibig sabihin ang libro, tulad na lang ng pagtuklas sa sarili, pagsunod sa nais gawin, at syempre, pakikiaglaban sa politikal na aspeto ng buhay. Pero dito, sa pag-ibig o pagmamahal… sa paksang lahat ay makaka-relate, mas napokus ang atensyon ko.

Posible nga kayang magmahal ng dalawang tao, o higit pa? Pero kung mahal mo siya, at mahal mo rin ang isa… sino ang mas mahal mo sa dalawa? Bakit, at paano nagkaiba ang pagmamahal na iyon sa isa’t-isa, at sa iba? Totoong tanong iyon dahil hindi ko pa nararanasan. Isa ring mahirap sagutin, o kung masagot man ay mahihirapan pa rin akong intindihin.

Siguro, ang isa sa mga nagustuhan ko sa kwento ay ang karakter na ni Lea na kung ano desisyon niya ay paninindigan niya iyon. Naramdaman ko rin siya sa ilang katangian na nakikita ko rin sa aking mga kaibigan at maging sa aking ina. Si Lea, sa kabila ng magiging matatag ay mahina rin. Lalo na sa kaniyang nararamdamang lungkot at pag-iisa. Oo, may mga anak siya, pero naramdamang kong she’s still longing for something real. Something deeper. Hindi lang basta connection sa isang tao, hindi lang sparks. Sino ba namang hindi naglo-long sa gano’n ‘di ba? At kapag naramdaman mo ‘yon, mapapasabi ka na lang ng… “Minsan, may mga gabing sana’y wala nang umaga.” gaya ng title ng post na ito. Malaking tama sa akin ng parte na ito sa libro at naramdaman ko kung gaano kalungkot si Lea:

“Mahal kita pero mamaya’y wala ka na’t malulungkot ako. Hahanap-hanapin kita, iiyak ako, magdurusa ako… pero kasama ‘yon sa mga katotohanang kailangang yakapin ko. Doon ka, dito ako… kanya ka, wala ako. Pag itinanong niya ‘ko sayo, sabihin mo: magkaibigan na lang tayo.”

Malungkot hindi ba? Maligaya ka, pero hindi magtatagal ang kaligayahan na iyon. Malungkot ka, at babaunin mo ‘yon habang wala ang kaligayahan sa’yo. Madalas ay mas matagal ang kalungkutang mararamdaman mo, dahil matagal dumating ang ligaya, subalit mabilis mawala.

Naramdaman ko rin si Ojie. Gaya ko rin siyang lumaking hindi kapiling ang tunay na ama. Naramdaman ko kung gaano kahirap kapag tinatanong kang “Nasa’n ang tatay mo?”, pero mas maswerte lang ako’t mahal din ako ng tinuring kong ama na tiyuhin ko, asawa ng tiyahin ko’t kapatid ni Mama, dahil sa kanila ako lumaki. Heh. Share lang.

Ang libro perpekto para sa mga single mom, gaya ni Lea. Sa mga ina na mag-isang bumubuhay sa kanilang mga anak, na ayaw lang makulong bilang isang ina.

At para sa pagtatapos ng post na ito, narito ang dalawa sa mga linyang halos bumuod sa libro:

Bata-bata… pa’no ka ginawa? Dahil may dalawang tao riyan na naghandog ng sarili nila sa isa’t-isa, dalawang tao na nag-akalang magkabuhol na ang buhay nila. At kahit nang matuklasan nila na mabubuhay rin pala sila nang wala ang isa, wala nang magagawa… ang bata ay eto na.

Bata, bata… pa’no ka ginawa? Hindi bigla kundi unti-unti, tulad sa lahat ng normal na proseso ng paglaki. Unti-unti’y nakikita mong may iba’t-ibang mukha ang mga tao, isa-isang natutunugan mo ang iba’t-ibang kahulugan ng mga ingay at tinig. Sa paglaki, napapansin mong may mga tanong na mahirap sagutin, at may mga utos na mahirap sundin. Higit sa lahat, natutuklasan mo na habang naririnig mo ang mga sagot, lalong dumarami ang naiisip mong mga tanong….

Panda Love! ❤

Hello pips! How have you been? How was your looong weekend? Where did you spend All Saints and All Souls day? I hope you enjoyed and also got to relax during those times. As for me, it was good! I just stayed at home with my family, prayed for the souls of our dearly departed, and went to a Cafe in Pasig last Saturday. And now I am going to blog about the place.

It was my first time knowing that the cafe existed and learn that it’s quite famous. My cousin, who happened to stay a night in the house said she really wanna go there, and so we did. They say that it’s the first ever Panda-themed cafe in the Metro and millenials usually go to that place, even people from far away places (nearby provinces and cities) just to visit and try their food, and… of course, take a pic with all the panda stuff and costumes!

The cafe is located along Amang Rodriguez Avenue in Pasig. It was not far from the main road and can easily locate! We only used google maps and asked people of its whereabouts, and luckily, we found it!

The place was so jampacked that day and we had to wait for an hour inside its adjacent shop — Salon de Esa. I think they are sister stores / owned by the same person, so yeah.

The interior is very neat, with monochromatic colors of black and white and vintage-y tables. We were lucky that our table was near the panda stuff toys so we could take pictures right away!

I don’t have much pictures of other side of the cafe because there were too many people, and couldn’t capture the perfect angles so pardon me.

Well, aside from the cute interior, their foods are also a bomb! I can say that it was a bit pricey, but it will surely satisfy your tastebuds!

I loved their Quesadillas and Nachos!!! Well,you see, the first food that I always order upon visiting and trying out a new food store is their Nachos (if available)! and I could say that theirs is one of the best I have tasted so far. I so loved that it has veggies hihi. Also, the cheese of the Quesadillas is quite unique, and very creamy. I am not a cheese person, but I loved its taste! Not too salty. Yummm.

We also ordered a small panda cupcake which costs 50php, but don’t look at the price, I tell you it’s worth the money! I think there are other variations of panda cakes there that we haven’t ordered yet because $$$, but sure, we want to try it sometimes. So lucky that we also have another panda cupcake for free because it’s my sister’s birthmonth, and she availed the promo.

My second favorite is their Carbonara! It is very creamy, and at the same time hindi nakakasawa!!! I’m craving now!

Their spaghetti tastes differently but I also loved its aftertaste, much like mint or something. We only ordered these out of many menus but I (we) will surely go back to try the others! :)

And now it’s time for our pictures. Teneeen~

It’s me in my natural habitat. I have finally found my relatives. mehehe. Just kidding. I just love the huge panda over there, but I kinda pity the panda, looks sort of sad and… tired. Hehe. Hey, I’m not talking about myself lol. I’m serious.

It’s me, my cousin, and my sister. Aren’t we cute? Hihi. It’s been a long time since we last hangout like this, and I hope there will be next time (and more next time) soon.

If you wish to go to Cafe De Esa, just visit their facebook page to get more infos on how to get there! ;)

Saturday Errands

It was a looong day yesterday, and I was so drained yet happy to spend my weekend with fun and awesome people — my temporary team in the office, and some good old friends since high school.

We had a team building in the morning, so at 9am, I prepared going to The Grounds Resort in Antipolo, Rizal even though the call time is 8. Haha! I only had an instant noodles for bfeakfast because I know there will be food in the resort. Hehe. The travel was only 45mins or so from home, so glad the traffic was not that bad yet. Halloween / All Souls Day is pretty fast approaching and some people are going home to their provinces, so heavy traffic and volume of passengers are expected.

When I arrived at the location, my first reaction was the place was sooo comfy and cozzzzy! I really love it.

The resort is located inside Ticzon Herbal Garden. You won’t notice it at first, but if you walk further you’ll see the resort. One good thing about the place is the neighboorhood is very quiet and calming, you wanted to stay there forever.

The very first thing you’ll notice upon entering is a pathway and a fountain. There are also some several objects around and I swear they are so damn cute!

I love the birdcages over there, I only wish there are really birds inside. I think it will add more effect in the place since it’ s already naturey~ Hehe.

This is one of my faaaave~ The Cabin is very cute! I thought it’s only for display but I learned that it’s going to be our room and we can use it for the day!

You’ll love it inside! A cute wood table of four will greet you when you open the door together with a sink and a refrigirator, and in its right are the bedssss, a sofa, and a tv. Yep. There are plenty of beds, and I think it’s for approx 20pax! It’s perfect for overnights and staycation with friendssss!

The place is very vintage feels too! I so love the bicycle over there, I wish I could take it home hahaha!

Let’s talk about the pool. I love the fact that even though it’s sunny that time, the water was still cold and refreshing! Anyway, credits to Czae for this pic, I just grabbed it from her fb accnt hehe. It’s me in the pool by the way. I’m such a loner, I know. 😅

Aside from the place is good, the team is also fun to be with and I think that’s what made it more enjoyable. We sang Karaoke, cooked food, and shared laughter together! I forgot for a while that they are my officemates, it seemed like they were all really my friends. Credits to Ate Jam for the pics above.

We parted ways at 5pm and I met with my highschool friends afterwards!

It has been two years or so since I had a decent get together with the three of them, I was absent when they get to spend staycation last time somewhere in Cubao together with other friends, ’cause things were not really going pretty then for me, so I’m glad that I finally had time to catch up yesterday.

The funny thing is, even though a year or two has passed, it feels like it’s only months ago since we last met. You can really be comfortable with people you knew and knew you even after a long time.

We had dinner at Chubby Cheeks (???? I really forgot the name haha) Kamayan Restaurant in Angono, and stayed somewhere drinking milktea and frappe while talking about everything until 12am. Hehe. How I wish we could stay longer.

I realized that we are not getting any younger and I also noticed our improvement in terms of ~physical~ and ~emotional~ matter. We are really in the adulthood stage omg. :'(

So todaaaaay I’m also excited because I’m going to meet with some college friends. Hihi

Book Review: Dekada ’70 by Lualhati Bautista

My mind is fighting over what language I should use as I write this book review of Ms. Lualhati Bautista. But because, I started this post in English, I guess I have to be responsible in finishing this in English. Just correct my grammar if I’m wrong, that would be much appreciated. Hehe.

First thing’s first, I would just like to say some introduction about the book:
Dekada ’70 was set during Marcos’ Regime, and it was one of the political novel that depicts strong point of view about the Martial Law. This book made me appreciate the life more — this current life and state that we’re in, much to say. We’re still lucky to not experience suppression like before. We can consider ourselves more free though we’re not completely, compared to the past. Poverty is still rapidly increasing, and more people are still dying. However, we must be (somehow) thankful that we can now get to voice out our opinions anytime, anywhere.

Though aside from that, the book is also a feminist. Well, feminism dominates the political point of this book. It tackles and narrate how women struggled to live as a woman (not just a wife) before, esp. during the time when women being equal to men was still a concept. The book, indeed, is such a powerful tool and an eye-opener to all the women, especially housewives — mothers, to know their rights and discover their own capabilities as a woman.

Anyway, just to share you something, I got the book together with her other books in Manila International Book Fair this year and they were all signed by Ms. Lualhati herself!!! My heart was so happy even though I got broke after he he.

Getting to the post, I guess I have to start the book review.

Dekada-70-2nd

Setting
I am not familiar to the time that this book was written. I didn’t personally experience Martial Law, but I know some stories from the books and stories of the people from that time. I could say that Ms. Lualhati is such a nice story teller because she made me feel, and made me experience the struggles of the people in that time just by reading the book. From the moment you read the first ten chapters, you will be automatically be dragged to the past.

Characters
There are more than just one character in this story. It was not just about Amanda, the mother of five boys (Julian Jr “Jules”, Isagani, Eman, Jason and Bingo). It was about Filipino families who lived in the most horrifying times of their lives.

My favorite is Jules, the eldest son of Amanda and Julian Bartolome. He reminded me of my eldest brother, for the reason that they were the same. keyword: were. It was long, long ago so I think it’s now safe to share about it. My brother is already living a life far from Jules now, anyway. But I salute him for choosing to stand and make a move for the sake of the Filipino people.

I also like Em. Ah well, he is the most ideal character for me. I want to become like him. Because he chose to fight in a way that is less harmful than what his brother did. I can say that they are the same, but still different. He is also the calmest character in the book. From the time he entered college and pursue the thing he love, despite of his father’s opposition to him becoming a writer, he just stay calmed and pursued the course. And also the part when… he told his father what happened to Jason. It was a heartbreaking scene for me. If I were him, I’m probably running home already crying, making everyone panic.

The characters, despite of being written by just one person, made their own characteristics and personality in the book. For example, the five Bartolome brothers, they are children of Amanda and Julian, but that’s the only thing they share in common. They are all different, because they have their own lives, and choices. They create their own path in life.

Favorite quote
“Hindi iisang paraan lang nakikitungo ang tao sa kapwa niya, dahil siguro iba-iba ang pangangailangan natin sa iba’t-ibang tao, iba-iba ang inaasahan niya sa iba’t-ibang tao, tulad din ng iba-iba ang inaasahan ng iba’t-ibang tao sa kanya.”
(The reason why people don’t treat other people in only one way, because maybe we have various necessities from different people, we have various expectations from different people, just like different people expect various things from us.)

I may have to disagree to this just a little, because if you’re going to absorb the quote and it will made you say “yeah, it’s right”, then that will count you as an opportunist. But well, this is the cruel truth that is happening now in the society. Again, correct me, if I’m wrong.

Reaction
Well, didn’t I just write my reaction in the first part of this post? Hahaha. Uhm. I have nothing left to put in this part aside from I loved the book. It knows how to hit me in the soft spot and also make me question the truth written in the book. I suggest you should read this too if you haven’t. It is such a great story written by a legend.

I am currently reading “Bata, Bata… Paano ka Ginawa?” and I can say that it’s also a feminist book, so yeah. I’ll also try to come up with a book review after I read that. For now, I will end this post.

Ciao.

Oo

Kagabi lang ay nakita ko ang larawan niya sa facebook, ngayon ay narito na siya kasama ko.

Gusto ko siyang tanungin kung ano ang ginagawa niya rito, pero natatakot ako na baka ‘pag tinanong ko siya ay bigla siyang umalis.

“Hey.” ang nasabi ko na lang sa kanya matapos ko siyang lapitan.

Ngumiti siya sa akin at sumagot ng “Hi.” pabalik.

Tanginang ngiti ‘yan. Hays.

“Long time no see,” sabi ko. “Kumusta ka na?”

Medyo matagal siyang nakasagot sa tanong ko na iyon. Sapat na oras para pag-aralan muli ang kanyang mukha na halos ilang taon ko na rin na hindi nakikita sa personal.

Nagkalaman na siya uli. Katamtaman lang ang katawan niya kumpara sa huli naming pagkikita na parang kinulang sa kain. Hindi mo aakalain na ito na siya. Ganito na siya. Parang kailan lang…

Parang dati lang, nung mga highschool kami, mukha lang siyang mapayat na nerd na magaling sa math. Hindi ko siya pinapansin, dahil busy ako sa pagpansin sa iba. Nakakausap ko naman siya pero hindi mo masasabing malapit kami sa isa’t-isa.

Siguro, nung nagcollege lang kami tuluyang naging magkaibigan. Naging magkaklase kami nang mag second semester, first year. Nagtuloy-tuloy na hanggang makagraduate ng 2yrs.

Doon ko siya nakilala. Masaya siyang kasama. Marami siyang alam na cool na bagay. Minsan lang siya umimik, pero kapag nagsalita palaging may laman.

Doon ko rin nalaman ng bahagya ang personal na buhay niya. Pareho kaming hiwalay ang magulang. Iniwan kami ng papa ko, habang sila naman ay ng kanilang ina.

Magaling siya sa halos lahat ng subject. Magaling siya sa logic. Mabuti siyang kaibigan.

Doon ko siya hinangaan.

At doon ko siya nagustuhan.

Halos limang taon kaming hindi nagkita pagkatapos, o sabihin na nating hindi ako nagpakita dahil gusto kong kalimutan ang nararamdaman ko sa kanya.

Alam ko naman kasi na hindi iyon masusuklian.

Nito na lang ako sumasama sa mga pag-aya ng mga dating kaibigan. Madalas pa ay wala rin siya.

Biruin mo, ang haba na ng panahon ng nagdaan. Marami nang nagbago sa kanya at sa akin. Marami na kaming kwento na hindi alam ng isa’t isa.

Subalit gano’n pa rin. Yung mga mata niya, gano’n pa rin.

Malalim. Maganda. Biglang nawawala kapag ngumingiti.

Pucha.

Napansin niya ang pagtitig ko, kaya iniwas ko ang aking tingin. Nakakahiya.

“Ayos lang, ikaw kumusta?”

“Okay lang, tara kain ka.” pagyaya ko sa kanya.

Nalimutan kong bigla kung ano ang okasyon. Birthday ko ba? Birthday ng pamangkin ko? Ni mama? Sino ang may birthday?

Pero kung birthday ko, bakit siya lang ang dumating?

Kumain na siya. Nakipagkuwentuhan rin sa ibang bisita, habang nagninilay-nilay ako ng pangyayari. Hindi ako aware na close siya sa iba kong kamag-anak.

Ah, naalala ko noong nagpunta siya sa burol ng tinuturing kong ama. Kahit mag-isa ay nagpunta siya para makiramay.

Naalala ko tuloy nang pumanaw rin ang mahal niyang lola… ni hindi man lang ako napadaan. Nagchat lang ako ng condolence, at sinabing hindi na ako makakadaan. Nakonsensiya ako sa nangyari, parang napakawalang kwenta kong kaibigan.

Pero alam ko namang naiintindihan niya ikung bakit.

‘Di nagtagal, kailangan ko nang umalis. May lumapit na isa kong tita at sinabing uuwi na raw kami. Lalo akong nalito. Kaninong bahay ba ‘to?

Tumingin ako agad sa kanya. Tumingin rin siya sa akin at ngumiti.

Alam na niya sa mga tingin ko na nagpapaalam ako.

Hindi na naman ba kami magkikita? Kung magkikita man, gaano pa katagal? Iyan ang mga tanong na nasa isip ko… and as usual, walang sagot.

Maya-maya ay lumabas na ang mga kasama ko. Gabi na, kaya naman nakakatakot sa dadaanan. Nauna na sila, samantalang ako ay naroon pa sa kusina. Ayoko pa kasing umalis.

Nagmadali lang ako dahil bigla akong natakot maglakad magisa doon sa dadaanan. Sobrang dilim nang matanaw ko.

“Teka lang, hintayin niyo ako.” sabay takbo papalabas, tangay-tangay ang isang bote ng tubig.

Sa pagtakbo ko ay nalaglag ang takip. Kukunin ko na dapat nang bigla siyang sumulpot sa tabi ko at siya ang kumuha sa lapag.

“Tara na.” sabi niya, saka naglakad.

Paglabas namin ay umuulan. Napatingin ako agad sa kanya.

“May payong ka?”

Umiling siya bilang sagot.

Naalala ko bigla ang dati, umuulan din noon at wala siyang payong. Meron ako, pero ayaw niya yatang sumukob.

Inisip ko kung ayaw pa rin ba niyang sumukob ngayon. Pero bakit kaya ayaw niya noon? Hindi ko kailanman nalaman ang sagot.

Binuksan ko ang payong at inalok siya. Ngumiti naman siya at naglakad na kami.

Kinakabahan ako, pero bakit ako kinakabahan? Matagal nang nabura ang feelings ko sa kaniya. Hindi na dapat ako kabahan.

Pero nagpatuloy akong gano’n. Dinaan ko na lang sa kwento para hindi ko maalala.

Napansin ko na nababasa siya, kaya inusog ko ang payong sa parte niya.

“Lumapit ka ng kaunti.” sabi ko.

“Hindi na, okay lang.”

“Hindi okay, nababasa ka oh.”

Hindi na siya nakipagtalo. Lumapit na lang siya ng kaunti sa akin. Ako ang may hawak ng payong kaya hindi ko tantiya kung gaano siya nababasa.

Napansin niya siguro na tumitingin ako sa kaliwang braso niya, kung saan tumatama ang ulan, kaya kinuha na niya ang payong sa’kin.

“Okay lang ako, pero akin na nga.”

Nagtama ang mga kamay namin nang kunin niya ito.

Dumoble yung kaba ko.

Nasa balikat na niya ang pisngi ko. Tumangkad ba siya? Ang alam ko mas matangkad ako sa kaniya dati.

Alam kong ayaw niyang may didikit sa kanya kaya lumayo ako bigla. Masiyado yatang obvious kaya bigla niya akong hinila pabalik.

“Mababasa ka.”

“Hindi ah, i-ano… i-ganito mo ng kaunti, hindi naman ako nababasa.” naiilang kong tawa saka inayos ang pagkakahawi ng payong.

Muli, nagtama ang kamay namin.

Tinanggal ko ang kamay ko sa payong ng mabilis.

Tangina, kanina pa ako naiilang. Pagsigaw ko sa isip ko kasabay ng paglakas ng ulan.

Nababasa na ako, pero ayokong magpahalata. Ayoko rin kasing lumapit sa kaniya.

Bigla na lang akong nagulat nang umakbay siya sa akin, pero syempre, hindi ko rin pinahalata na nagulat ako. Alam ko namang ginawa niya iyon para magkasya kami lalo sa payong.

Hindi na lang ako umimik. Napangiti na lang ako at napa-oo nang bigla niyang tinanong…

“Ganito rin ‘yon ‘di ba? ‘Yong dati, ganito rin noon, ‘di ba?”

At iyon ang huli kong narinig nang tuluyan akong magising mula sa panaginip na imposibleng mangyari.

pagkasabik

ix.iv.xviii

umiiyak na naman ang langit.
kasabay ng pagtamlay ng buong paligid
ang paglaho ng kulay sa mga bulaklak,
sa kalangitan,
sa kabundukan,
at sa mga matang dati-rati’y puno ng sigla
sa tuwing masisilayan ang isang ngiti,
maririnig ang isang tinig,
at mapapalagay sa isang natatanging piling.

napaisip, gaano na nga ba katagal?
noong huling nasilayan ang liwanag,
huling naramdaman ang init sa mga balat –
ng nagliliyab na araw,
o dagitab ng isang nilalang,
at ang sinabing hindi magmamaliw na nararamdaman.

muli kong pinag-aralan kung paano —
paanong tahimik lang na nahuhulog ang mga luha ng langit
sa malamig na aspaltong pinagpapahingahan.
ang maliliit nitong mga patak ay dinama.
pawang nagmistulang mga talulot ng bulaklak sa gaan.
ngunit nakasusugat sa pagtagal.

nagbabakasakaling dito matututunan –
kung paano at kailan muling mahuhulog
magtitiwala
at aasa sa isang kasiyahan na matagal nang kinalimutan
— ng walang pangamba at pagaalinlangan.
gaya ng ulan.

umiiyak na naman ang langit.
ang mga dahon ay nagsisiawit ng pasasalamat,
habang sila’y nananabik sa muling pagsikat ng araw.
katumbas ng pagkasabik kong makaramdam muli —
ng sakit na may halong ligaya,
o kaya ang lumuha ng may dahilan.

Sa’yo

Pareho kaming pawisan nang tuluyan kaming makapasok sa hall kung saan ang concert ng paborito naming banda. As usual, maraming tao kaya siksikan sa labas pa lang ng Arena.

“Shet, excited na ako.” masaya niyang sabi sa akin habang nakapako ang tingin sa stage. Ang ngiti niya, abot sa magkabilang tainga.

Napangiti na lang din ako bilang sagot. Ramdam na ramdam ko ang excitement niya noong mga oras na iyon. Ang tagal na rin niyang bukambibig ang tungkol sa concert at hindi niya ako tinantanan hangga’t hindi napapapayag. Syempre ako, go lang, palagi basta aya niya.

Lumalim ang gabi at lalong dumami ang tao. Hindi nagtagal, nagsimula nang lumamlam ang mga ilaw sa paligid at tumugtog na rin ang banda. Agad namang nagsihiyawan ang mga nasa paligid, kabilang kami, nang banggitin ang unang salita sa una nilang kanta. Ang sarap sa tenga, parang lagi kang hinaharana.

Pero ang pinakagusto ko, ay yung kantang Sa’yo.

Minsan Oo, minsan hindi~

Pangalawang kanta bago ang huli. Malapit na matapos ang concert.

Minsan tama, minsan mali~

Ah, kailan ko nga ba nagustuhan ang mga kanta ng banda na ito? At kailan ko ba ito naging paborito?

Umaabante, umaatras. Kilos mong namimintasss~

Anim na taon na ang nakalilipas?

Kung tunay nga ang Pagibig mo. Kaya ko bang isigaw~ Iparating sa Mundo~

Hindi ako masiyadong mahilig nakinig ng mga kantang malungkot, o masakit… o basta tumutusok sa damdamin, pero dahil sa kanya, nakahiligan ko ang mga gano’n.

Bakit?

Tumingin, sa’king mata. Magtapat ng nadarama~

Kasi… Anim na taon na rin akong may gusto sa kaniya. Kanino?

Kay Carl.

Kaibigan ko. Tropa.

Kaya ang hirap magtago ng feelings. Pero hindi ko akalain, maitatago ko ng anim na taon.

Saklap ‘no? Anim na taon kong pinapangarap na mahawakan ang kamay niya habang naglalakad; mayakap siya sa malamig, o kahit mainit na gabi; at mahalikan ang mga labi niyang paniguradong malambot. Sobrang saklap. Pero nakaya ko.

Di gustong ika’y mawala~ Dahil handa akong ibigin ka~

At ayoko na. Nung nga oras na iyon, sabi ko ayoko na. Gusto ko nang itigil ang kahibangan na ito.

Kung maging tayo, sa’yo lang ang puso ko.~

“Cherry,”

Tumingin ako kay Carl na nakatingin na sa’kin. “Ano ‘yon?” sagot ko. Ngumiti siya bigla.

Walang ibang tatanggapin, ikaw at ikaw pa rin~

“Ask me a question.” sabi niya.

“Huh?”

May gulo ba sayong isipan, ‘di tugma sa nararamdaman~

“Ask me anything.” sagot niya.

Napakunot ang noo ko. Anong itatanong ko sa kanya?

Kung tunay nga ang pag ibig mo~

“Masaya ka ba?” ang unang tanong na naisip ko. Hindi ko alam kung bakit.

“Yep. Sobra.”

Tumingin, sa’king mata. Magtapat ng nadarama~

“Then?”

“Next question.”

Natawa ako. Ano bang naiisip niya? “Uhm, nag-eenjoy ka ba?”

Di gustong ika’y mawala~ Dahil handa akong ibigin ka~

“Definitely, yes. Ask me one more.”

Napasalubong ang kilay ko at saka tumawa. “Baliw, kung anu-ano na naman trip mo, matatapos na itong concert magfocus ka nga sa stage.”

Kung maging tayo, sa’yo lang ang puso ko.~

“Basta. Ask me one more. Dali na.”

“Hmmm,” pag-isip isip ko. Gusto ko sana siyang tanungin nung mga oras na iyon ng: Mahal mo rin ba ako? pero siyempre, hindi ko pa rin kaya.

Kailangan ba kitang iwasan~ sa t’wing lalapit may paalam.

“Ano na?”

ibang anyo sa karamihan~

“Wala na akong maisip.” sabi ko. “Bakit ba kasi?”

Iba rin pag tayo, iba rin pag tayo lang~

Nang sabihin ko iyon, bigla siyang napangiti.

“Then it’s my turn? Wala ka nang maisip e.”

“Osige.”

Tumingin, sa’king mata. Magtapat ng nadarama~

“Promise you’ll answer yes?”

Di gustong ika’y mawala~ Dahil handa akong ibigin ka~

“Aba depende, kung uutang ka wala na akong pera.” pagtawa ko.

Kung maging tayo~

Mas lalong lumaki ang ngiti niya. “Please say yes.”

Kung maging tayo~

“Will you be my girlfriend?”

Sa’yo na ang puso ko.~

 

Movie Reaction: Goyo, Ang Batang Heneral

This may contain spoilers, but I promise I’ll do my best not to say anything that can ruin someone’s excitement to watch the movie aside from Goyo died. he he. Well, this is just a merely movie reaction so this is probably subjective.

Goyo: Ang Batang Heneral, is a movie about Gen Gregorio “Goyo” Del Pilar, who died at a young age during the Philippine-American War in Tirad Pass. It is considered as a sequel to another successful historical epic film by the same director, Jerrold Tarog, entitled Heneral Luna last 2015 as some scenes are connected. Anyway, if you haven’t watched the trailer of Goyo, you can watch it here:

Prior to this, there was a short film that served as a Prelude that was released in Cinema as a commercial / teaser entitled, Angelito, to introduce Goyo, which display its intertwining relationship from the first movie.

Anyway, going back to the purpose of this post, here are my reactions / things I noticed in the film:

  1. The ambiance is much darker (and frustrating, even though you already know the ending) — or is it because the colors are less saturated and it created colder ambiance and emotions? Ah, but this movie weighs too much for me. Huhu.
  2. Unlike the first film, this movie has a touch of romance, narrating Goyo’s relationship with different girls, most esp. with Felicidad and Remedios.
  3. Goyo without his uniform was a normal — usual person who just want to enjoy his youth.
  4. Some visual fx are disturbing, esp during the first attack of the Americans at night. The gun fires were too obvious, but well, it is still manageable to be ignored if you choose. Still kudos to the production!
  5. I didn’t feel the other characters. BUT my favorite was Vicente. Oh I love how he portrays such a good example of a Captain and a true friend! I cried over the scene where he was informed of Goyo’s death. *le cries* T_T
  6. Speaking of Goyo’s death, I just couldn’t accept that he died that way. I mean, he could have just died in a battle! But being shot while just standing and thinking — or maybe more like accepting their fate of losing, or reminiscing everything — is not okaaaaay for me. Oh my heart. MY HEART!!!
  7. I really hate Aguinaldo in both films. Grrr.
  8. I love that they used symbolism in the film — some are the mango scene, the dreams, Goyo’s drowning in the lake, the Gavel, etc.
  9. I hate Aguinaldo.
  10. I was hoping to know the real reason of Gen. Luna’s death. But oh well, I guess there will be more films in the future? Hoping.

I can’t say that it’s the best of Tarog’s films for now, but it was promising! I like Luna’s story more (AND I LOVE BLISS!!!), but of course, they lived different lives, so I still can’t judge lol.

Anyway, Goyo is still fafable.♥

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