24th ♥

Hello worpy! How are you? It’s been a while again. I’ve been busy with some things and I’m glad that I still get  by despite of every shitty things in my surroundings. We really don’t have a choice but to live the life we have, and hope someday we would be able to make it much better. Hehe. But anyhow, I’m here to blog about my 24th birthday, let’s just forget the negativity for a while.

I can’t believe that my month is about to end in two weeks! I’m still expecting some get together with old friends this coming days. Hihi. And so, just like what I said in the intro, I’m here blog about my 24th birthday celebration! it’s not that grand and I only celebrated it with my favorite people, and that’s more than enough.

Well, my birthday was a pretty normal day to me except from I didn’t render an overtime and went home early, visited lola and daddy’s place in Holy, ate at a fast food resto all by myself while reading my favorite webtoon, and was greeted by  my family, which made my day a bit special. But my whole day, I spent it in my room, sleeping, trying to gather strength for another shift for work. Hehe. Adulting kinda sucks, but it’s also fun especially when you earn money to buy the stuff you want. :p

Oh! A friend visited the house and she brought a cake. I thought she wouldn’t be able to greet me since she’s busy and I was too (busy sleeping lol), but mother woke me up saying Gracia is there. I was touched, really. Hehe. Here’s the cake she brought for me — may faaaave, choco mousse of Goldilocks.

PicsArt_07-15-11.01.22We talked for hours and forgot about time. We both need to go to work that day, so of course, she needed to go and I also needed to prepare. I’m truly happy that she made time for my day, despite of the busy schedule we both have.

The next days were normal, but the greetings didn’t end. My office mates still greet me ‘happy birthday’ and one of them also treated me food. Haha! They were all teasing me for ice cream tho. xD

Saturday came and my fam prepared a small gathering. Some friends and my sister’s friends came to celebrate with me. It was so fun ’cause we did videoke and sang all our hearts (and lungs hahaha) out.  We were so full from the food my mother cooked. I swear, she’s the best cook in the whole wide world for me~

PicsArt_07-15-11.00.31My second birthday cake~ It was given by my eldest brother and his partner. But it says it’s from Lucky! The baby dog we’ve been taking care of since last year. Lucky was a street dog, it followed my elder brother home, so my brother decided to take and keep it. But things became a bit complicated upon Lucky’s arrival so we gave it to our eldest brother. Now, Lucky is staying at my eldest brother house. Lucky visits the house from time to time tho. :)

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Annnd, here’s my fam. I know, I know, all of us are ~healthy~ hahaha!

Sunday came, and I must say that this is my most awaited day for me than my birthday (weird right? hahaha), because we were going to Art In Island! Actually, we already plan this day ahead of time. And we were all so excited!!! Sad that some of us couldn’t (didn’t he he he) come.

PicsArt_07-15-10.53.02It’s our first time together to visit the museum, and we were like children running inside the whole place upon entering! As much as I wanted to post all of the pictures here, I could not because there are so many. I only selected some photos to share. :)PicsArt_07-15-10.46.49This may seem so high school, but this photo style never gets old! :D Anyway, Art in Island is only in Cubao! The fee is a bit pricey but hey, it’s worth it! The murals are all breathtaking and awesome! They will leave you in awe. What’s more surprising is, the murals were created in just 120 days by the Artists! How could they be so talented?

PicsArt_07-15-10.51.54This is the only photo that we have that we’re complete. It’s really hard to have our photo taken together because no one would take for us. Thank you to one of the staff who took this! Hihi.

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Ehem, the girls of BFA. I know right? We’re all pretty~ Haha! And I’m sorry, I took much of the space on the right. Hehehe.PicsArt_07-15-10.55.40

Ang taba ko nakakainis, but this is my favorite photo! I wish I could use these wings and fly in real life. Hays. Hehe. Kidding.

The place was big, and I swear we got tired (or I only got tired? Mehe). Since there were also many people, we didn’t get the chance to take a pic to some of the murals. We went home at 5pm because the weather started to get mad. Hehe.

Ey! A friend also cooked a carbonara (with a burnt pasta xD). It’s still delicious and edible tho. Hehehe. I’m still thankful for all the efforts. So much ♥

The next day, I also met some old buddies (you already met them thru this post) to also celebrate my birthday. Truth is, I don’t have any idea how to spend the day with them, so Leidude suggested a place, which is the Paragon. It’s a KTV place which has rooms and you can eat while singing Karaoke! We all love to sing, obviously. Hehe.PicsArt_07-17-08.41.52I don’t have enough pictures to post from our singing sessions because of my cp battery’s life. We stayed there for four hours and went home.

Dude and I had dinner at Kuya J’s, but I only ordered dessert. Hehehe. I was soooo full from the drinks and foods we had at Paragon’s. Hehehe. I think I got a bit drunk? This is a secret. :p

I still have some remaining days (because it’s still July) to celebrate with friends that I haven’t seen yet.

Still thankful for this life. ♥

 

Eldar’s place, harthart

Hola pips! How’s your weekend? Mine was indeed awesome! Hehe. I’m here to blog about my magical experience yesterday, together with old (but still remain) good buddies. Yesterday’s more like a birthday celebration of my dude — none other than Lei — and I’m glad I am able to celebrate it with her.

It’s not my first time in EK, but this is the first time I truly enjoyed the place (and the rides)! Sad that the Space Shuttle’s not available. Huhuhu. I haven’t tried it since!!! And I also wasn’t able to ride my favorite, Anchor’s Away. They didn’t want to go onto the ride and I also didn’t want if they won’t. Huhu.

It also rained hard in the afternoon so we didn’t go to Wheel of faith to enjoy the view. Sighhhhssss 10x. But despite of every “little” jinx that had happened before, during, and after, the day turned out all well :)

Here are some photos I took~ bear with the blurry ones

PicsArt_06-25-11.43.20Let’s start with this photo. Since the sun was extremely striking hot that morning, only few people were around. It’s in the afternoon that the people started to grow in number.

I didn’t bring my camera with me so I only used my phone. Reason is, I went there to enjoy the place with my own eyes. Hekhek. But of course, I couldn’t help myself not to take my phone out of the bag and took some shots.

PicsArt_06-25-02.04.20This one’s my new favorite ride! Disk-O-Magic is the name, if I remember it well. Or is it only because the sun, the wind, and everything was very beautiful that moment that when I was riding it, I feel like I was shooting a music video or watching a semi-romantic, pero mag-isa ka lang kaya medyo dramatic scene? Hahaha. If I could just record what my eyes have seen, then I could share what I am talking about. Hehe. Seems like the feeling was very comforting.

PicsArt_06-25-11.14.38I think this is the only decent picture I had with dude, coz everything else are just snaps and wacky selfies. Thanks to K for taking this photo.

PicsArt_06-25-11.38.13I was also able to experience their new ride! Tho it’s not that very different to the 4D experience of Realto. The difference is just before you enter the “theater”, there are some shows/intros or displays first to watch and see.

PicsArt_06-25-11.40.49Oh, oh! Here is the “Mag-Anak”, an amazing wood sculpture of an Eagle Family made by an artist named James Doran Webb. It has subtitle that says: Unconditional and Enduring Love. There’s a video of how the artwork was built, playing in the lobby before you go up to the theatre area, and I swear, I remembered daddy when I saw this piece. Well, we have some eagle sculptures at home, maybe almost 5 or 6 pieces that my daddy made when he was still alive. Some of it are not done yet, and I am planning to self study wood sculpting to finish the unfinished.

The sculpture made me sad, and I think the title and the description matched very well to the artwork.PicsArt_06-25-11.28.33The night came and the place started to be more colorful because of the lights. Since I only have my phone with me and a friend to be a subject of my “gaze” series without him knowing, I didn’t get some decent shots.

Anyway, that moment in this photo brought me old feelings and memories. And upon reminiscing and trying to absorb it all, it is now clear that there’s really a fine line, with indefinite thickness, between me and them or that specific person;that there’s a wall  standing in between ever since that we (I) don’t notice or pretend that we (I) don’t, but at the same time, knew that really exists. Heh, I don’t know if I make sense with what I am saying. But with everything I have heard and observed that day, this sad realization hit me.

They still remain important to me, anyway. :)

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But hey, it’s me trying to look cute and fluffy, and them being… themselves. Mehehe.

PicsArt_06-25-01.58.54Good thing that the heavy rain stopped before it’s time for the fireworks!!! Aaaahhh I hope it lasted longer, but of course, walang forever? Hahaha kidding. It really is a magical experience, but… I think it’s more magical if you’re with the people who truly makes you happy, and with the people who you truly make happy. :)

 

Trip trip Vlog (with hugot) 112617

And so, I’ve made my first Vlog with my friend, LG! It’s not a formal Vlog, and I don’t know if you can consider this as a Vlog (Hahaha natripan lang talaga namin, di ko alam e, how can you say it’s a Vlog na buh? xD), but I hope you can spare some time for this! This video is full of “hugot” (somehow ahaha), just so you know. Hihi.

And uh, medyo fail pa ako sa pag-edit. Nangangapa me sa premiere. :p

The wall that can’t be seen, but felt.

I don’t know why I’m writing this, and emotionally sad while writing this. But there’s this feeling that says I should write everything in my mind, so here it is.

Sigh.

To the person that I will forever cherish,

I know I should be happy for you, because finally (not sooner, but possibly soon), there will be a person who will reciprocate your effort and feelings. A person who will take care of you, who will hold your hand anytime, and who will, for the first time,  save you from your nightmares and frustrations — all of these which I can not do.

I wanted to say I’m sorry for not being able to return everything that you gave; for not taking the same steps that you took; for not looking at your direction. I wanted to say I’m sorry, for not holding your hands when you needed warmth, for not hugging you tight when I had the chance, and for not saying things that will lessen your burden.

I wanted to say I’m sorry, for taking things for granted — for taking you for granted — and for not realizing sooner what’s behind your every actions and comforting words.

I wanted to say I’m sorry, for taking much of your time, and because of that, you had less for yourself.

And I’m sorry, for feeling selfish right now.

I know soon, you’ll have someone aside from me. And as your dear friend, my role is to be happy for you, but now… I can’t help but to feel so sad upon hearing and reading your happy thoughts regarding that matter. I am asking myself why. Was it the fact that sooner, I’ll be forgotten again? Or the fact the sooner, I won’t be needed by you anymore?

Or maybe I was just saddened by the thought that you and me won’t have the time, moment, and chances like we had before?

I don’t know.

I’m not sure why.

But regardless of whatever this is, if ever you need someone, I’m just here.

I’ll still be here.

The ending that is hard to take.

A new journey has ended for us, but the process of learning will never ever stop. 

Yesterday is one of the most important days for me, and I am truly grateful that I was able to celebrate it with the love(s) of my life. I am happy to be finally stepping out my college life and now re-entering the real world again. It scares me, though, because I know it won’t be as easy as the last time. But yeah, I’ll just follow the road I plan to take. This time… I will pursue the things I want to do and follow the dreams I once made when I was younger.

But somehow, the thought of not being with my friends / classmates that I consider as a family in the following days saddens me. I was used to waking up in the morning with the idea of seeing them later on inside or outside the campus for almost every day. Then now, we will be on our own, and will be waking up every morning to find each purpose in life separately. Hay. Time flies really fast. But this is the reality… The ending that is hard to take for me — the part of separating ways.

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I never knew that they would be this special to me. But now, they’ve brought so much memories to keep. Even though some of us didn’t make it to the end, and even though some of us decided to just let go of their dreams of finishing college and left early to find something worthy, they’d been a part of the group that I will treasure forever.

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I will miss the exchange of corni jokes and nonsense stories, and playing uno cards during our break time.

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I will miss the looong walk under the hottest days that we always do when we’re bored… and also because we don’t have enough money to take jeepneys / trike just to reach the places we would like to go. Haha.

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I will miss the unexpected vacation and journey to some places we’re not familiar with.

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I will miss the late night shoots for our avps & short films, and the staying up all night for video editing.

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I will miss the tambay moments in the nearest mall, the movie marathons, the overnights with smooth and sincere talks, the misunderstandings too… every thing.

They made me feel better just by being with them. It’s like I am with the people who truly understands me and my views in life. They’ve been a part of my improvement… and they’ve become more than a family.

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They are home. 

Clingy as it may seem, but I miss them already. I just hope nobody forgets.

Because I will never ever forget them.

Sana…

“Kaya nung sinabi niya na gusto ka niya, nainis ako kasi bakit parang gano’n na lang kadali ang umamin? Sana kinaibigan ka muna niya.. Sana nakita niya muna yung mga nakita ko. Sana may ginawa muna siya para sa’yo. Ang dami kong sana…”

Sana kaya ko rin ibalik lahat, lahat – hindi lang mga ginawa mo, kundi maging ang nararamdaman mo. Pero sorry kaibigan, hindi ko talaga kaya.

Sana normal na lang yung gano’n. Yung kahit maibalik ko yung kung anong ibinibigay mo, walang magagalit, walang magsasabing mali. Pero kasi, kahit naman na pilitin kong gawing tama, ay hindi ko kaya. Hindi ko kaya.

Sana pwede kong pawiin lahat nung sakit, o kaya kabiguan mo sa pag-iisip na hindi ka magiging masaya sa gano’ng bagay. Pero kahit na sabihin kong someday ay may darating na gagawa nang mga iyan, ay alam kong hindi ka pa rin lubos na magiging masaya dahil sa hinahawakan mong paniniwala.

Masakit malaman na gano’n pala talaga, but at the same time, masaya. Dahil alam kong may isang taong walang ibang gugustuhin kundi ang nakabubuti para sa akin. Sa kabilang banda, nakakalungkot… kasi gusto ko ikaw rin maging masaya. Gaya ng kagustuhan mong maging masaya ako.

Salamat. Salamat sa lahat. Gusto kong maiyak. Nakalulungkot.

Nakakadisappoint din, dahil all this time, buong akala ko ay ibang tao. Narinig ko pa nga ang mga hinaing mo, binigyan pa nga kita ng mga advise, tapos malalaman ko na ang totoo, ako pala talaga iyon at hindi ang pangalang nabanggit mo. Dapat noong tinanong kita kung sino, ay sinabi mo na ang katotohanan.

Sana tama ang naaiisip ko… na product lang lahat ng utak mo. Na iniisip mo lang na mayroon kang naramdaman – nararamdaman – ewan.

Sana hindi ko na lang pala nalaman.

Failed Jump Shots to These! :P

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???????????????????????????????It’s me (pale blue shirt) and mami (yellow shirt, friend since highschool) Teheeee. I love the second picture! :D

 

Page 22 of 365: Missing you…

 

thoughts

Page 22 of 365:

I miss you,

do you miss me, too?

 

Page 15 of 365: Mixed emotions.

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Page 15 of 365:

If you really don’t want me to talk to you, okay I won’t.

But, can you  at least just smile in front of me?

So that I can still feel, somehow, that I’m your friend.

/Ireallydunowhazwrongwithyouorwithme:(

/irrelevantpicture

Page 14 of 365:

ate sethPage 14 of 365:

Having a friend who knows you better than yourself and who always believe in you when no one else does is one of the best gift you’ll receive from Heaven.

I’m thankful to have one.